Site logo


Hello industry leaders!  Last week we introduced you to what we believe the phrase “Community Over Competition” embodies.  We covered the first of three instalments and today we’re here to chat about the second – Assistance.  

One of the most beautiful things to come out of the Community over Competition movement is the emergence of collaborations, resource support, and mutual encouragement of your “direct competition” peers.  The Wedding Society & The Celebrant Society alone have produced a wealth of resources within their Facebook forums thanks to so many contributing members sharing tips and information with each other.

However, the outside perception of Community Over Competition has created some confusion about what “sharing” actually means.

CommOverComp, in its most effective form, is a way for industry professionals to support and encourage each other.  It’s really important that this is not confused with giving away all your secrets or letting someone use your exact ideas, products, words, or intellectual content and calling it their own.

Big difference. 

We find some people who don’t fully understand CommOverComp shying away from it because they think it means they have to share with other professionals whatever it is that they believe makes them unique.  So, to clarify, here’s what “Assistance” of your fellow industry community looks like – the things that it IS and the things that it ISN’T.

What it IS:

  • Cheering someone when they jump online to say they accomplished a goal or smashed a wedding out of the ballpark.
  • Helpfully telling someone where they can find the resources they are asking for – not necessarily providing those resources yourself.
  • Providing empathy and compassion when someone reaches out to show vulnerability or say they stuffed up.
  • Asking your community for general ideas and concepts they might have for a professional service you are trying to provide
  • Asking for your community to point you in the right direction of where you might be able to source those resources yourself.
  • Giving in exchange for taking.  
  • If someone offers or freely provides something of their own intellectual property, crediting them at every point of its use or reference.
  • Thanking someone publicly for any direct assistance they have provided you
  • Teaching a man to fish, ya get what we’re saying??

What it is NOT:

  • Being expected to give away your direct products, wording, services, intellectual property, images, or other produced content for free.
  • Asking for direct products, wording, services, intellectual property, images, or other produced content from its owner/creator for your own use without offering something useable to them in return.
  • Jumping onto a thread where someone has offered something directly to someone else and saying “Hey, can I have a copy, too?”
  • Utilising the assistance, services, or content of another industry professional without crediting them for that work or referencing them when discussing it.
  • Taking help when offered without at least offering something in return (we’re not talking “I owe you one, thanks k byeeee!!”.  We mean offering something right then and there that will be of use to that person.  Can’t think of anything?  Think harder.)

How this plays out in real life:

Example #1


You are not happy with the quality of your Terms and Conditions Contract.  You want to make it better and are seeking help on how to go about this.

Poorly Worded Question: 

“I need to redo my Terms & Conditions.  Does anyone have a copy of their own that they could share with me to have a look at?  Thanks.”

Poorly Worded Response:

“Here, I do.  Oh, and for anyone else asking (of which there are one bajillion), I’ll spend the rest of my arvo emailing them to you, too.”

Better Response:

“Terms and Conditions Contracts really should be tailored to your own specific services so I wouldn’t recommend modelling yours off other examples, but here’s the website of the people who helped me develop mine and I think they did a really great job!  Tell them I sent you ☺”

Better Worded Question: 

“I need help with my T&Cs!  I’m not happy with them currently.  Any ideas/direction/help on how to go about improving them would be much appreciated.” 

Poorly Worded Response:

“I updated mine last year from someone in here who sent theirs to me – can’t remember who.  Anyway, I’ll send them to you so you can use them as well.”

Better Response:

“[This tagged person] helped me a lot last year when I needed help with the same issue.  The biggest lesson I learned from her assistance is that you should ensure you cover your bases for clients who change the location at the last minute.  This blog post of mine [or other useful website] goes into detail about that, along with other points that you should consider when developing a contract.”

We hope that helps to clarify and point you in the right direction of how to help while still maintaining your own professional privacy.  If you could use more help about this, please feel free to get in contact with us and continue this conversation at [email protected]

Next week we’ll be delivering the final instalment of this discussion… networking!! 


Until then, lovers of love,

Anna & Sarah xoxo

Want to find the perfect vendors to help create your dream wedding?

Like? share it with your friends

Author Bio

Anna and Sarah

Meet Anna and Sarah

Sarah is an executive radio producer, celebrant, and leader of The Wedding Society. With over 20 years of experience in the media and events management space and nearly a decade in the wedding industry, Sarah is the bubbly, vivacious source of energy that makes this community thrive.

Johanna has worked for over a decade educating & helping to lead changes in workplace culture as a Celebrant, a nurse, and a leader of The Wedding Society & The Celebrant Society.Johanna is the ally you want in your corner if you ever need a helping hand in this business.

This blog was written by Anna, one of The Celebrant Society Directors.